Andrew

Dear Andrew,

     We have known and loved you for almost three years now.  When we met you you looked like this:

You started out in our child sponsorship program and we quickly knew you were really sick and needed help.  We fed and tried to help you with your medicine the best we could even though you lived in such hard conditions.  Your mother had died and your father was nowhere to be found.  You lived with distant relatives that didn't really care for you.  You came to school every day and never smiled, you were lethargic but hanging in there. After realizing that we couldn't help you enough and your disease was killing you we asked other's for help.  We didn't have the Arise Home built yet and had to get you in a living situation that would help you more than we could at the school.  We took you to Mother Teresa's orphanage that is run by Catholic nuns, you were scared and didn't want to go.  I will never forget driving you to the home, taking you out of the compound and place you had only known your entire life.  I was scared too for you, I knew what we were doing was the best for you but I was concerned. I had to get on an airplane the next day and fly back to America and I wasn't sure I would see you again Andrew, you were so so sick.  I had tears in my eyes when we left Lusaka because I was worried.  Luckily John was on the plane next to me reassuring me we have done everything we can to help you and that you were a fighter. 

Mother Teresa's Orphanage graciously took you in and nursed you back to health.  They fed you all the time and helped with your medication.  You made great strides, you still were sick but much better.  When we visited you were happy and enjoying yourself.  In fact, sometimes you hid at Mother Teresa's when we showed up because you were scared we were there to take you back to your old life. They had promised us to help you until we could take you to live with us forever.

Finally the Arise Home was built and ready for YOU Andrew!  We moved you in on December 17th, a day I will never forget.  You were 15 and weighed 52 pounds and was as tall as a 7 year old in America. 

We have learned so much about you these past few months as you live with us and became part of our family.  You are neat and orderly and take care of your clothes.  Your dresser is ALWAYS the cleanest and you can make a bed like a champ.  You have patiently sat through hours and hours and hours of clinic visits with Megan and Lucy and Dailles as we continue to fight for your health. You take your medicine on time every evening and help manage it.  You HATE the Ensure milkshakes we force you to drink but you do it. You are one SERIOUS Zambian Soccer Team fan.  In fact you threatened to run away to watch the soccer game because we didn't have a TV but we didn't believe you would do it.  We were wrong!  There might be a bit of a stubborn streak in you :) You love school and work very hard at it.  You are a really smart kid.  You like to have water balloon fights and could play soccer in the back yard all day long. You don't like crowds and retreat when there are visitors that come to the home, that's OK!  You have big dreams and one day you will reach them. 

Andrew, every time you go to the clinic I call and text Megan and make her immediately tell me how you are progressing.  You now weigh 68 pounds and you have grown 2 inches since December!  All your levels are correct and your medicine is working!  We are SO proud of you buddy! 

                                         Look at how handsome you are and great you look!

Look at the difference:

God blessed us with getting to love and have you in our family Andrew.  We can't wait to see what a great man you grow up to be, but until then you are our's and under our roof!   We love you and are SO SO proud of you! Megan and your house mammas work so hard for you and they deserve all the credit in this, well right behind God of course.

Love,

 Alissa, and the rest of the Arise Africa Family

Two Simple Words

Peter

A few weeks ago I got a call from Africa and I heard that the boys in the Arise Home were being difficult.  We discussed discipline options and how to handle the situation.  After some time of talking to our staff in Africa we had a plan.  I was surprised to find out that our oldest boy, Peter was one of the big issues.  Peter is the sweetest and most obedient kid we have most of the time!  He also is our oldest in the home and a great leader for the other kids. When he is good.  When he is bad he has 7 other children right behind him wanting to do and act like he did which causes the Arise home to go into meltdown.  You gotta keep the natives in order and it starts with Peter and Hope, the oldest. 

I told our staff to send me a text when they got finished talking to the boys and I wanted to speak to Peter myself.  It is great to be able to talk to both Peter and Hope on the phone.  They understand English well and are really fun to chat with and hear about school and everything else going on. And to occasionally discipline, when the need arises. For some reason getting a call from America kinda makes them scared. :)

A few hours later I got a text saying that I could call Peter.  I called Lucy who was on duty at the time and asked her to put Peter on her phone.  This was right after the boys had just received a pretty stern lecture by our staff.  I heard Lucy walk through the home and find Peter and tell him Auntie Alissa was on the phone and wanted to talk to him. And I heard Peter say "Oh no."  It made me laugh really hard. Peter NEVER gets in trouble so this was new ground for the guy!

Peter got on the phone and I was pretty nice but went through the rules of the home and how much we love him but need him to do his part.  He was very quiet but continued to say ok and that he understood.  We talked about school and the privileges he has and how much we want to help him and the other kids.  We talked about fun things we could do in June when I came over if he behaved well.  Peter said he really wanted to have a water balloon fight and I promised him to bring some water balloons over if I got a good report from the house moms.

I went on for a while lecturing Peter and talking really fast and telling him how much I believed in him but needed him to behave.  At the end of our conversation I asked him to give the phone back to Lucy.  I could tell he kept wanting to say something

and he finally asked, "Auntie Alissa can I tell you one thing before I give the phone to Auntie Lucy?"

"Sure Peter you can say anything." I replied

"Auntie Alissa I am sorry and I WILL be better and I thank you for all you have given me." - said Peter

And with that I started crying on the phone which really scared Peter!  I was so overwhelmed to hear him apologize, it was a glimmer of hope for all the effort our staff has put into these kids and helping them learn to be good people.  I explained to him that was all I needed to hear and that we of course forgave him.  We went on to talk for a long time about apologizing and I told him I had to apologize to friends, and family and others all the time for things I messed up on and that was OK. (I am sure if my family is reading this they would say I never apologize:)  We talked about how Biblically we are called to apologize and that it makes your relationships stronger when you can admit you messed up and then you get to move on. 

And with that we ended our conversation. 

As hard as we have been working in the Arise Home those moments make it worth it.  We need those times that you see the kids understanding how to love and be loved and how to respect others. It is affirming and shows you how loving kids and giving them a home to live in with the basic needs of life truly does change them and their hearts.  God has blessed Arise Africa with GREAT staff and house moms and a home that is beyond nice and accommodating for these kids.  We are making a difference in their lives, one small step at a time. 

Not only have I packed water balloons for my trip in a few weeks but also have purchased two water balloon launchers that look like this one down below.  Peter is going get his water balloon fight!

- Alissa

The sifting of Arise Africa

    "Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat.   But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers." 

Luke 22:30-31

      A few years ago I was hanging out with a friend who was helping me get through a hard time in my life.  We discussed how things can be difficult for a period of time and that Satan wants to sift you like wheat.  My friend kept directing me towards Luke 22 where it is discussing Jesus' last supper.  In Luke 22:30-31 Jesus speaks to Simon and says "Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift you as wheat.   But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."

     We talked about how with hard things in life God never turns away from you or lets you loose your faith fully.  You might go through a period of uncertainty or anger at God but he will never fully let Satan "sift" or get to you.  This is common throughout the Bible when you look at Job or others who suffered.  And even though our flesh wants to be angry or give up or feel that you cannot overcome whatever is in front of you, you will make it if you continue to trust in God. However, you have to fight to not be fully sifted.  At the time I must admit I don't think I fully understood being sifted and tested and what it looked like to be sifted and be OK.  When you are in the middle of a hard time it is difficult to see that things will get better.  But, as my friend told me, I saw years later that I had been sifted and that I had made it through.  In fact I think one's relationship with the Lord is strengthened through those difficult times.  I know mine was, even though I didn't like it at the time! James 1 talks all about this.

I listened to a Tim Keller sermon on this exact part of the Bible the other day:

http://www.desiringgod.org/resource-library/sermons/the-sifting-of-simon-peter

     Something jumped out to me when Tim Keller talked about how he has noticed that Satan likes to attack or sift you when maybe there has just been a major victory or spiritual achievements that have happened in your life that has glorified the Lord. And this does make sense, Satan doesn't want God's kingdom to be glorified. 

     It really struck me though because Arise Africa was definitely being sifted in March/April. We had just opened the Arise Home in December/January and had all these exciting things happening to us.  We had new kids in our custody, were expanding and hiring more staff, and were gearing up for another awesome project with the Kershaws for Kershaw's Challenge 2013. 

    But we were being attacked too.  In fact for about a week straight I think I was called from Zambia at least twice every night.  And I know things are bad when I get a call in the middle of the night USA time, that means we have trouble!  I remember one time answering the phone and Megan literally saying "Everything bad is happening this week!" We had difficulty in the Arise Home with one of the kids.  We had a bit of a security issue at the home we had to work through.   One night I answered my cell phone at 3AM to hear Megan say, "OK don't freak out but Peter (kiddo in the Arise Home) got his finger slammed in a door and lost the tip of it, we are taking him to the hospital right now and we do have the tip with us in a cup, let's hope they can sew it back on. I thought you would want to know."   Lovely, what a wonderful way to be woken up!   (the tip was not able to be salvaged but the poor guy had surgery and his finger was repaired)  Then a day later we had a water issue with the well at the home too, which was an expense we didn't expect. All of these things came at once.   We were both laughing and the craziness as we discussed how to work through all the trials that had been thrown at us.  We were being sifted!  And a few months earlier we had a major triumph for God's kingdom by the Arise Home opening and everything else happening. 

     Our staff pulled together and really helped out these past few months.  They helped handle the security situation and take care of the kids in the home.  They stepped up and dealt with Peter's injured finger and took him to the hospital and clinics.  They got him through it, although his middle finger is not the longest anymore on one hand.  I never thought our first major medical bill would be for a middle finger.  kinda fitting for us :)

     Every time we make it through a hard time I am reminded that God was there for us.  In fact, it is our Zambian staff that remind me constantly of this.  Sometimes when I am worried or stressed they politely just say, "God won't let us down."  Oh yea Alissa remember this isn't YOUR show to figure out and worry about, God will take care of us.

     Although the sifting wasn't fun and all the trials were difficult, I am thankful for the reminder it gives me to rely on HIM.  I am grateful how during difficult times I am forced to pray often to God and lean on Him.  I am even grateful for the bond and seeing our staff pull together and work as a team to serve the Lord and take care of everything.  Sifting brought us closer to one another and we laearned to have faith. 

     I don't have all the answers to trials in life. I am the first to say that when I am sifted I am a mess and sometimes not very nice.  I am learning to be a better person during my sifting.  But I have been sifted enough to take something from it and to rely on HIM and grow my faith.  There are SO many things in life we try to do without the Lord.   It is so much easier just to dig in when it gets hard and know that you have to give it up to the Lord.  Things might be uncomfortable or painful for a while.  But beg for help, comfort, security, and most importantly faith and see what happens.   He doesn't let you go through it alone, I promise.  Just ask Him for help. 

The Oscars and Africa actually have something in common...

This past Sunday night I watched the Oscars along with the rest of America.

  I would write an entire blog post about Renee Zellweger's eyes or the lack of being able to see them but I am going to refrain.  OK but seriously what happened?  I don't even think she could open them enough to read the piece of paper that said who had won the Oscar she was presenting.  Don't you think that should be a requirement if you are a presenter?!  Where are the friends and family to the Hollywood stars that should call them out on going to the extreme with the botox or that some of those dresses just don't look good??  I can PROMISE you that my friends and sisters would fall on the floor laughing at me  (that would be their way of "calling me out") if I was walking out the door and getting ready to put myself in front all of the world to see and had taken too many pain killers or couldn't open my eyes fully for whatever reason!  I'm just saying a little bit of honest truth could go a long way for Hollywood. 

Now to the real blog post... 

The day after the Oscars I downloaded the movie Beasts of the Southern Wild. 

I had heard great things about it and it didn't let me down.  It is a great movie.  For those of you who haven't seen the movie you need to see it but I will tell you a tidbit without ruining it. 

Here is a brief summary of the movie taken from the website:

"In a forgotten but defiant bayou community cut off from the rest of the world by a sprawling levee, a six-year-old girl (Hushpuppy) exists on the brink of orphanhood. Buoyed by her childish optimism and extraordinary imagination, she believes that the natural world is in balance with the universe until a fierce storm changes her reality. Desperate to repair the structure of her world in order to save her ailing father and sinking home, this tiny hero must learn to survive unstoppable catastrophes of epic proportions."

Something about the movie was really hard for me.  I am not much of a crier or emotional person in movies but this one in particular was very difficult for me to watch.  There were times when I found myself wanting to turn it off because I didn't want to see what would happen to Hushpuppy or how she would be treated. At first I thought I was so emotional because I just just finished a vacation with my family and had just walked off a plane after spening three hours sitting next to my two and half year old nephew.  That will bring anyone to tears. He's adorable but you try explaining to him that he can't open and slam the tray table closed a thousand times while the businessman in front of him scowls at you.  (hey man we all were babies at one point in our lives, chill out)

But then it hit me why this movie was so hard.  The story and the struggles in the movie are exactly what every child we work with in Africa faces everyday.  This was personal for me.  I know people well that live like this.  When they would show her home or the physical abuse it reminded me of our kids in the Arise Home and what they used to deal with.  It made me sad to think of the kids that we work with that are still in these situations.  Our kids in Africa live that life.  Every stinking day.  I know many Hushpuppies in Africa and their names are Mukonda, Fred, Guideon, and Esther to name a few.  And we see it and live it with them at times.  Our staff tries to help them get out of these life cycles but they also try to help them endure their situations. 

Take a look at Hushpuppy's house on the outside:

Take a look at a house that one of our kids in our child sponsorship program lives in:

Here are photos of the inside of Hushpuppy's home:

Here are some photos of the inside of our child's home:

                                          (and yes that is a real live baby in the corner)

I thought how interesting it was that Hushpuppy loved her father dearly and wanted to be with him and even care for him when he was sick.  Her father was an alcoholic and physically abused her.  Many of our kids in Africa are verbally and physically abused all the time by family members.  Sometimes the family members are drunk and other times they aren't.  And yet our kids still love them and want to be a part of their lives and feel an obligation to care for them and stay with them.  Why is that?  Is there an inside instinct to stick to our parents and family no matter what? Or is it all these kids have and they don't know any better? 

At one point Hushpuppy experiences positive physical attention by a woman holding and hugging her.  It isn't sketchy like I am making it sound.  But Hushpuppy says she can remember every time she has ever been held in her life, and it was two times.  Once when she was born and then this time.  Many of our kids in Africa never experience physical touch and affirmation.  I have watched our girls and boys in the Arise Home draw to us as we pat them on the back or hug them when they come home from school.  They want to hold our hands and they want that love so badly.  Kids their age in America are probably over that amount of physical touch but since our kids in Africa never got it growing up they are behind.  It is a TINY example of Christ's love for them that we can show them.  Positive words and love go such long way in a child's development.

Another aspect of Hushpuppy's attitude that I could relate to was how tough and relentless she was. 

This kid NEVER gave up.  She was willing to do anything to save her home and her father.  She was self sufficient and could cook for herself (even if it was cat food).  Our kids in Africa are the exact same way. They run over glass barefoot and burn themselves while cooking and don't even think anything about it.  I remember one time we were having a kids Bible Camp with some Americans and there was a soccer game going on.  There was an American boy playing with our Zambian kids and he got a soccer ball kicked right in his face (by another American who shall remain nameless).  He went down pretty hard and was crying because it hurt, and it looked like it hurt!  All of the African kids stood looking at him shocked and one of them even asked our Zambian leaders what he was doing and couldn't understand that people cried.  Growing up, my friend Amanda loved the movie A League or Their Own and this story reminds me when Tom Hanks says, "There's no crying in baseball!"

The lessons I learned about Beasts of the Southern Wild was that I didn't like the life for Hushpuppy.  It made me sad to watch it unfold.  It made me respect the spirit of a child and the ability to live in terrible situations.  It made me even more fired up for what we try to do in Zambia. And that's help kids have a life that God desires for them. 

But the biggest emotion I had was that the movie made me very uncomfortable.  I don't think it is right to sit there and know that really happens in this world (and not just Africa, but in America and other countries too!) and not do something about it.  It is wrong and that fires me up.

I lay in bed at night and think of how we can help more kids and have a bigger impact.  I discuss this with people who know more than me in the development world and friends who have the same hearts.  I read blogs, books, and other information on what works and does not.  I dream and plan and pray about what to do next. 

 I want to ask one question and that is, what fires YOU up? 

Are you going to continue to sit there and not get some skin in the game to whatever that may be?  It might not be about kids or Africa and that's ok.  God has put things on our hearts and wants us to be servants to everyone around us.  Where is your place in all of this?  What is the one thing that God wants to use you for?  What are you going to do about it?  And I don't want to hear a problem is too big and you can't change it.  Your exactly right if you never try. Arise Africa wouldn't have 150 kids in child sponsorship or have built an entire orphanage if people thought they were too small to make a change. we wouldn't exist!  It has taken literally thousands of people who thought they could make a difference to support us to get us to where we are now. 

The best part about getting involved in something bigger and more purposeful than you is God actually will teach you more about yourself than you ever expected.  You will blessed in ways you didn't even know you wanted or needed. Take the chance and do something and see what happens.  

In Him,

Alissa

Our Surprise Father Figure

Sometimes the greatest part of my job is watching the Lord orchestrate the people He puts in our path to hire.  This past fall as we were frantically trying to get the Arise Home open and kids moved in we were looking to hire house moms, housekeepers, and a gardener.  I was getting updates in the USA about the search and quite honestly the gardener was a person who I didn't think much about.  I knew we needed someone who could take care of our yard and grow vegetables for the kids to eat.  I was told that we had hired a guy by the name of Jeff and he didn't speak GREAT English but he would catch on.

When I arrived in December to Zambia I met Jeff.  I was a bit taken aback at Jeff's physical appearence.  He is about 6 feet 4 inches tall, and this is VERY TALL in Zambia.  Most men are about 5 feet 8 inches tall so Jeff really stands out! (no pun intended)  He is an older man for Zambia standards and I was impressed at his work ethic. 

Jeff has a few kids and two grandchildren that he is very proud of.  He moved to the compound close to our home and lives in a tiny one room place with no running water or electricity.  He never had a bank account until we helped him open one.  He didn't even have a registry card, which is like our social security card.  Jeff can't count or tell you his ABC's but he works tirelessly everyday in our yard and garden.  He is one of the hardest workers I have ever seen.  He runs across our huge yard when someone honks at the gate and it needs to be opened.  He lifts huge bags of cement when building things.  He checks the irrigation lines in the garden and weeds constantly.  He plants all the grass in the yard and levels out the driveway.  He cuts our grass with machete, not a lawn mower.  When I mentioned to Jeff I would buy him a lawn mower a huge grin came across his face. He has been a gardener his entire life and has never used one. 

What I am most impressed is the influence and impact Jeff has on our kids.  He is calm with them and let's them learn in the garden.  He helps them plant seeds and teaches them how to pull weeds and get the roots out.  When we tell all 8 kids to go in the yard and help Jeff, he is out there helping each child learn what to do.  If you told me I had to take all 8 of our kids and help them work in the yard I would run away.  He works with the boys on cutting the grass with the machete.  (this scares me!).  He teaches them how to water the plants and take care of the garden.  He is gentle with our kids and has become a father figure to them.

After some days of convincing, Jeff now eats lunch and dinner with the kids when they are home.  After learning he doesn't have running water at his home we offered for him to shower in the boys bathroom.  He was so thankful and brings his own soap to not use ours.  He helps us take the boys into the compound to get haircuts and takes them to get cokes afterwards.  He even comes to our home every Sunday morning and helps us take the kids to church.  He likes going to church with them.  That is Jeff's day off.  Jeff is willing to stop work and go meet the kids walking home from school if our house moms are caught up with something.  It is funny to see this very tall man walking with our 8 kids through our community and even funnier to see him carrying all the girl's pink backpacks.  And one night we had an emergency and Jeff and another staff member of ours took the night shift and got dinner made and ready and got the kids in bed. 

Before working for us Jeff had never had clothes that fit him.  It is hard to find clothes that fit a man of his size in Africa.  Luckily on this past mission trip we had some tall guys who graciously left their clothes for him.  Jeff proudly now wears t-shirts and shorts that actually fit him.  He told me he didn't know that clothes were made to fit a guy of his size!  There is no "Big and Tall" store in Africa!  For the first time ever, Jeff has tennis shoes that fit, size 13 and all.  I found a pair of mud boots in town that were size 13 as well.  When I purchased them and brought them back to Jeff he told me he never had boots for the rainy season because the bigger sizes were more expensive. 

Sometimes we know who will have an impact on our kids in the Arise Home.  Jeff is loving on and teaching our kids to be good kids.  I see him talking to the boys and helping them get through conflict without fighting.  He is a father figure that the Lord has blessed us to have in our family with our kids.

- Alissa